A Year of Things We Never Told You (& Some We Did)

Let’s begin with a riddle, shall we?

It’s not a very good one…but….

What do you call a dating couple who never dates?

Small business owners.  #funny #notfunny #imlaughingbutcryingontheinside. 

Hello! Bonjour! Hola! Günaydın! Here we are, almost a year later from the last time we **tried** to get back into the swing of things on the blog. I am sitting in my classroom, rummaging through the contents of the past school year, and cannot believe that we allowed almost a year to go by without breathing a word. 5 posts we wrote, maybe? We used to do 5 in a week. 

But tomorrow is the very last day of the school year, and then I become a human with only ONE job – and I cannot tell you how liberating and exciting that is! Unfortunately Scott still has two, but I can be around to help so much more on the farm and at the Factory that life will get easier for him, too. Don’t worry babe – I got this. 

As we lounged with coffee this morning and discussed how much we miss the blog (oh wait, that’s every morning) we compiled a list of the things that have been most significant for us this year, though a few take up more time than they should and have been harder than we ever dreamed. 

In an effort to get everyone caught up, here is what life looked like for us over the past year: 

Tomorrow it will be a year from the moment we lost Ivan. Not a day has gone by that I haven’t grieved this loss, and time didn’t necessarily make things better. Last summer I lost myself, too, and went through one of the hardest chapters of my entire life. It was about Ivan, but it was also about change. And growing up. And growing old. And knowing that hard losses will continue to happen, and I just wasn’t ready to be an adult, handling something as difficult as losing a best friend.  I went to a very dark place, and only emerged when life returned to “normal” in the fall and I could busy myself with teaching. 

Scott launched his bar. The dream came true last September when he started shaking his very own craft creations behind that beautiful white quartz counter at the Factory. Since then, he has designed over 75 custom cocktails and has poured roughly 8,000 drinks. I am proud and intensely biased, but anyone who has had a Scott-tail knows the difference, and it has been a dream come true for me just watching how happy this endeavor makes him.  He’s not just a mixologist, but an entertainer. 

Oh, Scott lost his wedding ring. That we didn’t tell you. I convinced Scott to get a spray tan with me before our trip to Florida in April, and there he lost his ring. We knew by the time he reached the car that he had not put it back on his finger, and he scoured the salon and the street to no avail. If you see him at the bar, he’ll occasionally be rubbing his ring finger with his thumb, willing the ring to return.  One of these days I’ll order him a toy ring to wear, but in the meantime, he’s married, ladies… and btw – that tan looked GOOD – even though he claims he will never get one again because he is so scarred. 

Speaking of things that went slightly awry, Scott bought me two Japanese cherry trees for my birthday that I could plant near the pond and pretend I had my DC Tidal Basin in my own backyard. They were perfect and nothing made me happier. And then with the torrents of rain this spring, they drowned. So yeah, no cherry blossoms on Fox Cross. Better luck next time. 

Cado came into our lives and everything changed. We broke the news we were adding to the family on Facebook, and then came that post to Cado from Ivan that had me ugly crying the entire time I was writing, but Cado is truly a blessing to us.  A 9 year old Pit Bull rescue, Cado is everything I never knew I needed in a life post-Ivan.  We discovered within days that he was deaf, had food allergies, issues with his back legs, digestive trouble, and a host of other issues. But he has a heart of gold, and I think Ivan would be thrilled we have him to watch over us and the farm. 

In the last 12 months, we traveled – barely. After we lost Ivan last summer, we went to DC and Delaware for a quick change of pace and scenery. It wasn’t until April that Scott and I had our first vacation in years. We hung out with my sibling group in St. Augustine, Florida and recharged our dead batteries. I then surprised my little sister in San Antonio for her 30th birthday a few weeks ago, and will be flying down again this Sunday to road trip back north with her for the summer. Nothing more splendid than a summer on the farm with my sister. 

And finally? Shirt Factory. A blessing and a curse. Scott and I never imagined how our life would change with the addition of a small cafe in a small town, but it did. And our lives look so different and unrecognizable to us now it hurts. But along with the challenges, we have made so many friends and accomplished so many goals, things we never thought we would by 35 years old. We have an appreciation for small business life and the sacrifices that we never knew our friends made with their businesses. We have a long way to go and we have made so many mistakes, but we are proud of what we have done and are beyond grateful for all of your love and support. Much more to say on this one, but this post is already too long, so that’s enough for now. 

I would say that I don’t know when we will next write, but since the post is already written, maybe we will get back into the swing of things here. “Normal” for us is dating and writing and LIVING, something we need to do along with working, which is my plan for the summer. 

Happy Tuesday, all.