“Baby Minute” F.A.Q.
It has been almost a month since we broke our baby news on the blog, and weeks later we still cannot believe the outpouring of love and well wishes we felt across our accounts. We are so grateful for your support, as this is definitely not the path we anticipated taking at this point.
Before we continue, please know all photos of our niece and nephews are posted with the permission of their parents – we believe vehemently in obtaining that permission, and encourage others to do the same if posting images of children not their own.
The news very few people saw coming has elicited so many questions from our friends, family, and Minute readers. Let us be painfully honest with you: this was not in the plans for us. But that is not to say it was NOT planned. Confusing? I bet. After a month of fielding all sorts of questions, we’ve decided to set the record straight and explain this crazy new twist on DC Minute – which I hereby now claim DC stands for “Diapers and Champagne” because I’m pretty sure that will sum up the next few years of my life (don’t worry Scott, someday we will be the Dating Couple again).
Question#1: Was it planned??
Isn’t this bizarre? Scott and I still chuckle at how many people ask such a personal question. I mean, I’d be wondering too if I were you, but I still blush in trying to plan my response – thank goodness for masks! Yes, we know how babies are made and yes, we did “try”. Isn’t that mortifying?? I’ve turned a deep shade of crimson over here but I’ve got a bump to prove my shame. So I guess the jig is up and the secret is out. Try teaching teenage boys and not feeling like you are wearing a scarlet letter every day of your life…Thank you, Nathaniel Hawthorne.
Question #2: “It’s because of Wren, isn’t it?”
NO. Not. At. All.
Oh my goodness do we love that child, and we’ve made no attempt at hiding our sheer obsession with that little girl. She is one of the greatest gifts of my life and I could not adore her more. However, Scott and I have been blessed with 2 amazing nephews and one incredible niece, and to be utterly honest – once Wren arrived, we felt our roles as Aunt and Uncle were complete. We didn’t need one of our own because Anne and Adrienne did all the hard work for us! Why go through having a child when we could spoil our niece and nephews?? Guys – we’re old (ish) and I didn’t want to be called geriatric as a mother-to-be. Yeah…that hasn’t been fun.
So NO, watching firsthand the difficulty of bringing a child into the world and navigating that adventure was something that Scott and I felt was not for us. We love you Wren – but you aren’t the reason we are having our own.
Question #3: Are you finding out the gender?
YUP!! And we already know. We had our doctor call my sister so that she could plan a special surprise for us. Adrienne let me be the first one to know about Wren and it was one of the greatest honors of my life, so I was so glad to do the same. Her reveal was EPIC, more than I could have ever hoped from afar.
We don’t plan on keeping it a secret for long, but Scott is set on waiting for the first major snowstorm to plot his next snow photo and our gender reveal. So, wish for snow? What does everyone think – boy? Girl?
Question Statement #4: You’re going to want more after you have this one.
Please, please don’t say that. Nothing is worse than finally wrapping our heads around becoming parents once that the mere suggestion of other babies almost robs our joy. We are thrilled to be adding one baby to Fox Cross, and no plans are in the works for another. Swear. Keep reading…
Question #5: So it wasn’t Wren, and you didn’t want kids…What changed?
I received less than optimistic news last summer about my health. It was scary and overwhelming and to be honest – rocked my world. I’m ok – nothing dire and no clear diagnosis, but my doctor wanted to make sure that Scott and I were completely over having children if surgery was in my future.
And believe me – the worst thing you can do to a self-proclaimed feminist is somehow take away the decision I made on my own. I didn’t need to be a mother to be complete, and my decision felt fulfilling because it was MINE. But the idea that I wouldn’t be able to have children if I changed my mind in another year or two left me wondering…what if?? Have I rallied against motherhood because I truly did not want children? Or because I somehow felt the statement was stronger than the act?
For the record – I have the best team of doctors on the planet, and looking out for me despite years of protesting is what I needed to address how I really feel.
Scott and I finally had the conversation we both avoided for years – and it was hard, uncomfortable, and took a lot of time to come to the same understanding. We decided that if it was meant to be, it would happen. And if not, at least we would not have any regrets.
About three months later as it turned out – it was meant to be. ❤️