Pillow Talk: Things Every Couple Should Do in Bed
Puh-lease. Our parents read our blog, so you might as well get your mind out of the gutter now. Well, enjoy the moment. And then read on :)
After we published our 11 topics that need to be discussed prior to tying the knot, we had several comments from readers about sex and intimacy. Talking about sex on the blog seems a little out of our comfort zones (Hi parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, former students, former teachers!!) so we left that off the list of topics. However, in talking about the post we actually discussed how intimacy is one of the most important parts of a long-lasting relationship. It’s often an embarrassing topic, so we thought we’d put the sex talk on hold in order to discuss a few other ways we spend quality time in bed.
We both work full time jobs and often our schedules make us feel like ships passing in the night. We have learned to capitalize on our bedtime as time to reflect and connect, as well as steal away during the day for a few other activities that involve the sheets. This list is just a few of the things we like to do in bed…
1) Communicate – One of our favorite things to do (and as I type we just finished) is crawl into bed early with the pups asleep on our legs at the end of the bed and just talk about our respective days and all of the stuff we have going on. Communication is the #1 key to our relationship, and by putting down the cell phones and keeping the TV off for a few minutes, we get solid cuddle time while we really focus on what the other is saying (and importantly, what they may need as a result).
2) Watch the news – Scott is far better than I at keeping up with current events, but sometimes a healthy discussion arises from our two perspectives on recent news and media stories. I am stubborn as hell and love to get my English teacher on and play devil’s advocate, but Scott keeps me on my toes and constantly challenges me back. In bed, we feel less threatened and more connected, and so the debates stay intellectual and safe. No toes are stepped on and we leave the discussion always feeling inspired and mentally stimulated.
3) Coffee in bed – Sometimes the news is just too depressing, and in that case coffee together in bed (and perhaps a few crumbs from breakfast) is the key to a beautiful morning. There is something so relaxing about lingering under the covers and allowing the caffeine time to work its magic before rousing to start the day.
4) Read a book together – The plight of dating an English teacher. Poor Scott. He isn’t the world’s biggest pleasure reader, but when he gets hooked on a book he is fully committed. Lately, I’ve been suggesting some of my favorite titles and reading them out as we lie in bed at night. It’s just fun to share a book and react to events together, rather than just rely on the television to do all the work.
5) Engage in a binge watch – Speaking of television – it’s completely OK to relax and settle into a series together! Books are great, but I’m a huge film buff and think a good movie can often compare to a book any day. That being said, our current binge watch is Dawson’s Creek, so we aren’t talking about high quality film. However, it takes us back to a simpler time and reminds me of my adolescence, and it allows our inner-teens a chance at life. We love watching a show together, and doing so curled up in bed rather than a couch just adds to the intimacy and pleasure of the experience.
6) Breakfast, popcorn, guacamole? – Sometimes settling under the sheets with a fresh bowl of popcorn is the perfect weekend night activity, but I have been known to spread out a full Mexican dinner over the bed and chow down on Scott’s homemade guac. We lack a table at the moment, and nights where we aren’t in the mood to sit at the kitchen island we head into the bed and spread out a picnic. Eating in bed is not only super comfortable, but a refreshing change of scenery.
7) Pup Time – We obviously don’t have kiddos of our own, but the adopted ones come on 4 legs and are equally privvy to bed-time activities. Sometimes all I want to to is curl up with my man and my pups and have some family snuggle time. The dogs eat it up, and clearly so do we.
I think it goes without saying that the list could include a few more risqué activities, but it’s important to create a sense of intimacy and fun in a space usually reserved for turning out the lights and falling asleep.
Don’t get excited – but tell us, what do YOU do in bed?? ;)
-Al