After getting engaged last October, most of our wedding planning has revolved around conversations rather than concrete plans. Like many of you, we’ve found that the initial conversations revolve around the larger topics rather than figuring out centerpieces and stationary.
We’ve put a lot of weight on the where. There’s our hometown in New York or the place we now call home in Alexandria. One would get more of our family to attend, while the other would be easier for our friends. A completely different plan and set of desires accompanies each location as well. Rather than beating our heads against the table on this topic we decided to start with making the list of who we’d want to invite.
Our first step in creating the list was separating it into two different sizes – the larger wedding and the smaller more intimate celebration. We started by making individual lists of “our people”. I grew up in a very large family, even before you consider non-first cousins or family friends. Our basic-first draft list came to around 75 people. The possibility of a small-intimate 50 guest wedding is seemingly going out the window.
As we tried to get off the topic of where we’d get married we found ourselves right back in that spot. If we decided to get married in the Washington, DC area there’s a good chance not all of our New York family would be traveling. It’s easy to imagine the number being considerably higher if it’s easy for everyone back in New York. We’re left with the question of whether to make our list or pick a location first.
As we continue to look at states and venues we’ll continue to look at how many people each can accommodate. At this moment, I think we’re looking at a late summer or fall wedding depending on the location (in 2016). Making the decision on the location might turn out to be something we need to do before taking the next step.
How difficult was it to create your wedding list? Did you also struggle with proximity to family vs. friends?
Let us know.